Yesterday was a remarkable day, a day I honestly thought I’d never witness. After 15 years, since I walked away from full- time ministry, I accepted a call to minister once again. My faith has certainly evolved much as has my maturity and expectations. I believe I’m content being me and don’t need success to feel my worth as in the past. I also feel I understand people much better than in my youth. I carry no illusions of grandeur about neither leadership nor parishioner, realizing they are but frail creatures of dust struggling to get by each day, just like I am.
My exodus from the church was both self imposed and church enforced. I am confident my choice to walk away from ministry was both a spiritual and emotional consideration, which was needed by me and those in my world.
God is very good! God is fully aware of my strengths and my obvious weaknesses. My comfort lies within the certain knowledge of God’s care and provision. Gifts provided me even in times of my greatest distancing came with the directive to reminding me of an even greater purpose.
Now is the time for me to dance again. To feel the rhythm of life beat within my softened heart. It’s not enough to just feel that life beat but to sway to it’s moving. My goal is live life on purpose, to live with meaning and value. I want my life dance to reflect the depth of love I feel in my heart.
So here we go…pray for me as I step back into the great unknown. One filled with heartbreak, uncertainty, and frustration. I can’t wait.
