50…

 

Halfway to a hundred, the back nine approaches,

perpetually carrying the weight of fatigue.

Suddenly the view of my feet is obstructed by an ever rounding belly,

where did that skinny boy go?

Staying up late and going hard all day,

a mere memory of the past.

Planning activities based on a limited energy reserve,

naps vital to the day.

Once mornings were attacked and sprung from,

now a time of great dread as beautiful sleep comes to an abrupt end.

My children are the same age as my mind remembers,

the glory days of old.

Time is a blur moving faster than thought can maintain,

the ease of youth quickly becomes the chase of middle age.

I’ve become the creepy old man telling stories of a wild buck,

nobody cares, just go sit in the corner and be quiet I’m told.

Funny when the roles reverse.

Honor…

My path may look overgrown but the route is familiar,

seeking a trail of possibilities over a well worn sidewalk of sameness.

Mine isn’t the ordinary, neither are my thoughts,

finding agreement with the many brings no satisfaction.

The spirit sets our course, my heart’s compass points the way,

justice compels, compassion demands, isolation accepts.

Seeking honor for my soul, needing not mans approval,

eyes firmly focused on the immediate prize.

As the pillow embraces my tired head,

sleep comes easy living at peace.

This is all we have.

Safe…

 

Of the many things to have gratitude for today, one thing comes easily to mind.

My wife.

She gets me.

In a world filled with strife and confusion there is always one safe place I can go to escape and just be myself.

This makes me very, very happy.

Footprint…

Another day dawns without a clue

is this life led having any significance?

Existence, just a continued cycle of trudging through the mud,

dragging each step from the mire?

Purpose and meaning drive the thinker,

leaving behind a footprint.

Failing to see reasons, despair overcomes,

needing proof for some value.

The twisted mind of a dreamer,

seeking actualization over success.

Storm…

 

Warning came and alerted us to the danger,

tornados heading our way,

Gathering supplies for the long night ahead,

hoping we didn’t have to use them.

Watching the weatherman on TV,

showing our home soon in the storms path.

Is it time to head to the storm room constructed for such an event?

A little while longer, let’s wait,

trying to not accept the inevitable.

Suddenly sirens blared warning of dangers arrival,

into the safe room to ride out the tempest.

Howling winds from outside, branches hitting the roof,

rain pounding away at everything in its path.

Lightening so bright as to be seen through closed doors,

thunder shaking the house to its core.

Huddled together in an anxious ball,

praying for safety and an end to the madness.

Suddenly a change, quiet could be heard,

the storm had passed and taken it’s show down the road.

Be kind to the next family you meet,

my words to the storm.

Give them reason to come together,

but cause them no pain.

Today this one family feels closer because of your visit.

Enough…

Success comes with a price, oftentimes too high,

a fact easily missed.

It seems the more money I make

the greater my need for more.

A sad reality overlooked until now.

Stolen moments dreaming of simpler times,

when we had little but seemed to have so much.

Emotional wear taking its toll, fatigue a nearing cloud,

stress an uninvited companion.

Enough!

De-clutter, cast-off, abandon, simplify.

Breath deeply again.

Tired…

Husband and wife,

tired, not of each other.

Grind of life wears them down,

answering the bell to others.

Leaving little time for themselves,

missing that look found deep in a partners eye.

Happy home full of beautiful children,

depleted energy to enjoy.

The alarm goes off early,

too many projects on the list.

Bed becomes a place to collapse,

shared by the littlest of ladies.

Dreams of what once was,

hopes of what will be.

Love understood in depth,

a choice to honor and receive.

Not what imagined, so much more.

The Look…

Fourteen years ago our eyes first met,

a connection realized.

Across the room we held each others gaze

accepting the gift we found that day.

Slowly through the masses we moved towards the other,

heart racing uncontrollably.

The crowd seemed to part as we approached,

no obstructions to love.

A brief instant, frozen in the mind,

the smile that welcomed me.

A quiet voice inside prompting,

“my name is Mike and I’d really like to meet you”

spilled out before I was aware.

From that day we’ve never looked back or elsewhere…

as Rumi said, “Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere,
they’re in each other all along.”

I believe that.

Happy Valentines Day my love.

Divorce…

What many thought of as a forever love

actually was just a heart on fire.

The commitment vows promising to forever endure,

begin to erase as the fantasy becomes a challenge.

Dreams of together marching into life, a companion always by the side,

change quickly into a combatant with no thought of retreat.

Divorce is the final acknowledgement of what

was overlooked in the pursuit of love.

Truth can be a destructive force, when a lie needs exposing.

Cleansing pain, clearing us to expand and grow into what love truly is.

The lesson of understanding of love’s meaning by first learning what it is not.

Choose growth and live in happiness.

See yourself honestly, not a focus on others.

Evolve, and the page turns,

failure and the story remains the same.

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