Church Porn…

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If your church is promoting the new “Left Behind” movie because of its “christian” importance, please know you’d be better off showing “The Omen” in the church basement if you want actual scriptural integrity. It’s really hard to imagine rejoicing over the prospect of many people suffering because they don’t act and believe exactly like you do.  But we all dream differently don’t we?  Some dream of peace while others dream of revenge.   Open your eyes and see church porn for what it is.  Fire your pastor and step outside and embrace life and all those who make up our wonderfully diverse world with love and acceptance.

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Divided Unity

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If your pastor continues to rant about the lack of unity among fellow believers and without taking a breath, uses divisive terms to denote others who practice a different faith, hopefully you can see the problem right before you…fire your pastor.

Actually…

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If you hear “I’ll just take what the bible says as true” without acknowledging what that really means is “I’ll take what I think the bible says” as more important than what “you think the bible says.”  Your pastor has a messiah complex and needs to be fired.

Abortion…

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If you find yourself in a perpetual state of uproar over the issue of abortion, yet drive a BMW from your mini-mansion to an upscale church in the suburbs where you put your children in an exclusive private school, that anger you feel is the reality of avoiding what Jesus actually talked about; helping the poor, dangers of wealth, being stuffed deep down in your soul so you can focus on self serving interests like abortion.  The issue of abortion is but a great guilt relieving balm for the modern evangelical, it soothes a troubled soul searching for truth by creating an issue never addressed as important by the master, instead allows one to live a a sad lie by avoiding the responsible fiscal sacrifice taught clearly by Jesus of serving those with much less and focus on a paraded straw man.

Fire your pastor and read the bible for yourself and for goodness sake, don’t take what it said from the pulpit as the only truth.

Beatings…

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If the message you hear on parenting in church involves unbridled beating of children justified by the antiquated passage of “spare the rod, spoil the child” so your children will understand the “love” of God, it’s time to fire your pastor and get your children to therapy.  Maybe the counselor will help the child learn that love shouldn’t involve fear.

All in….

I recently came across this article by Robert Lofgren.  I think he expresses many feelings I share.

Why I despise fundamentalism:

• It sets ideas and beliefs above people.

• It reduces people, the world, and our universe to black and white. There is no room for anything or anyone that does not fit the mold and there is no desire to learn and explore because all of the answers have already been found.

• Beliefs must be defended at all cost, while love and mercy can be neglected.

• It is tiring and draining of your energy because you are always trying to hold puzzle pieces together that do not seem to fit…they are forced to fit. • It takes away room for creativity, favoring what is simple.

• It despises education, because education might conflict with dogma. • It separates and divides, only holding those with similar beliefs together. It furthers the tribal mentality.

• It creates a distorted image of who God is, crippling the relationship with the Divine, and it makes you a distorted image-bearer.

Fundamentalism can be found within any given worldview or religion. Often the fundamentalist is blinded to his own fundamentalism, while gladly pointing out the errors in another’s fundamentalistic beliefs.

Clarification

 

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The phrase “fire your pastor” doesn’t have to mean work aggressively to have him lose his job, more to the point it means, you leaving his teaching and getting healthy.

Motivation…

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If your motivation for doing good things for others is solely based on your fear of Hell and eternal damnation if you don’t, understand you’re a self-serving tool without a shred of decency; you need to quickly fire your misleading message giving pastor and relearn how to live as a real human being.

Mission Trip

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If your church one week celebrates it’s ministry service to poor Central American children then the next week, castigates these same children as worthless leaches as they try to come to the US for a better standard of life, it’s time to fire your pastor.

Give em Hell…

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If your church encourages Jr. High students to evangelize their friends while they realistically have little to no understanding of the true faith message themselves, it’s time to fire your pastor.

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