Church Porn…

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If your church is promoting the new “Left Behind” movie because of its “christian” importance, please know you’d be better off showing “The Omen” in the church basement if you want actual scriptural integrity. It’s really hard to imagine rejoicing over the prospect of many people suffering because they don’t act and believe exactly like you do.  But we all dream differently don’t we?  Some dream of peace while others dream of revenge.   Open your eyes and see church porn for what it is.  Fire your pastor and step outside and embrace life and all those who make up our wonderfully diverse world with love and acceptance.

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Just the way it is…

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When your pastor tells you something in an unkind way, but justifies it by saying “that’s just the way it is”or “I’m just being honest”, remind him that the vast majority of people who make such a claim come across as assholes.  Fire your pastor and get a new community to invest yourself into.

School…

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If the message sounding from the pulpit threatens harm to those who would try to prevent the church’s ability to evangelize without restraint on school grounds, relating to those damned liberal atheists who try to honor the separation of church and state, by all means…fire your pastor.

Emasculated Jesus ( a tribute to the Georgia gun everywhere law)

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Yea, thou I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil.

My sidearm beside me, my trust is in you Lord.

If someone should slap my face, I turn around and simply reveal my pistol

Let them know that Jesus stuff is fine for the preacher to read,

But I live by the American creed.

Nobody screws with me.  I have rights.

 

Amen

 

 

Rescue and Revive…

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I think it may be time to retake the term conservative back from the religipots that have hijacked and claimed it as their own.  These true believers have conveniently misquoted, misused and misappropriated God’s word for their own claim to fame long enough.  Each time a Conservative Christian is interviewed he (almost always male as they claim dominion over the weaker female species, otherwise if it is a female she acts like her valium prescription has been tampered with) never sounds like me or anyone I know instead acts in a manner than is so aggressive and mean spirited that their hidden jack boots begin to show.

I consider myself to be a conservative.  I truly do.  I take what Jesus said very seriously.  So seriously that I don’t dare try to add anything to His words to reflect my bias.  He summed it up so succinctly when he said everything I teach you can be summarized in this.  “Love the Lord God with all your heart and love your neighbor as yourself.”  To me that’s more than enough instruction on how to emulate the master.  Doesn’t touch anything grey and stays completely black and white.  So if one really is a conservative they would take this teaching as the epicenter of their faith practice and focus on fleshing this out.  Choosing to kick into hyperdrive Christianity to impress the locals only further distances oneself from the original intent.

So if I start referring to myself as a conservative Christian going forward you’ll know what I mean.

Time to reclaim what is ours.  Next reclamation phrase, Pro-life.

Just saying.

Respect…

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To truly be a respecter of life one has to accept all humanity without qualifications, asterisks, or reserves.  To do otherwise is but playing the part of a fraud looking only for acceptance of self, manifesting destructive behavior defined by a God complex that seeks ultimate power and authority where this is not obviously granted.  Like any bully from the playground when something is desired but is not forthcoming it is taken by greed.  This very greed as practiced by people of faith reveals itself in the form of practitioners wanting to keep the joys of God solely for themselves.  In doing so they mentally assent to the doom of others to satisfy their own shortcomings.  If only they could understand that grace and kindness, love and forgiveness being so bountiful to the believer that giving away ever so little offers so much more in return.

Perpetual purification should be left to moonshiners and kept away from the church.

Anything?

Intelligent minds thought it best to use every means available to critique and defame the name and performance of our current President.  Not one single day goes by that a new headline appears in a newsfeed somewhere about the latest shortcoming of our leader.  These are clearly offered to promote an atmosphere of fear and not to encourage belief and acceptance of the finer points of the challenger.

Not having a dog in this fight allows me the perspective of an observer without any emotional attachment in the outcome.  Maybe that’s not a completely true statement, some of the rhetoric coming from the opposition party has the hair standing up on the back of my neck.  Seems the only answer offered to any type of disagreement is to go start a war, whatever happened to diplomacy?  So maybe I have a limited attachment to the outcome.

So the question I repeatedly ask is; “So, What do you have to offer?”  referring to the group trying to replace our current leadership.  We all hear the negativity, we all hear the rally points of division, yet no answers are ever floated.  I find myself quite rightly brilliant on Monday morning second guessing the play of my favorite team.  I seem to posses an uncanny skill in having the right answers to the problems after they’ve already been played out.  How would I do in real time dealing with these issues as they occur?  Please, I would fail miserably beyond description.  Yet somehow, I seem to think I have the answers each Monday when talking about the shortcomings of my team.  This is even more true in politics.

From a person who has an above average understanding of world economics and is somewhat well read, to not accept and appreciate some of the examples of true leadership exhibited by our President during this administration is either downright dishonest or sadly uninformed.  Both are frightening.

Just shooting down the competition without giving anything new and exciting or positive and encouraging is just a grown up version of middle school girl spats in the hallway between classes.  Anything?  Bueller, Bueller?  Give us something we can believe in already or shut the Hell up.

Footshooting…

Things I wish the Evangelical Church could hear and understand.

  1. Signs outside church buildings with pithy warnings of Hell only serve as a point of amusement for the average passerby.  One may think they are clever and informative, most think these updates show great insensitivity.
  2. Political opinions, regardless of affiliation, destroy the credibility of the church.  One of the main reasons people are leaving the church in droves is because they see this entwining for the fornication that it truly is.  Think about this when voter cards are passed out on Sundays, somehow one side just happens to completely disagree with the church’s outspoken stance.  It can be safely stated nowhere in the teachings of the master does he endorse a chosen political party.  Isolating half the population and thinking of them as a combatant to the faithful further discredits the church’s mission which is unity and love.
  3. Seeking out fabricated enemies to create a culture of fear whereby the fault of all that’s bad in life happens because you’re not inside these particular church walls is beyond disingenuous, it’s evil.  Using fear to keep the faithful under control, while an effective tool, is manipulative and destructive vehicle that creates unthinking robots who fear their own shadow.
  4. If the church would teach it’s members the use of the word “why” and put it into practice as a regular part of gathered times together, positive, healthy, thinking followers could be produced.  The kind of people who ask questions and find answers themselves instead of just accepting what has forever been approved, but this would take deeper work by leaders.  Instead the church has mastered the use of the word “how” to detail it’s purpose with step by step instructions detailing life’s specific instruction book for anything and everything.  The church is masterful at the method of ‘sit still and instill’ type of learning yet fails miserably in the process of ‘synthesis’ level of leaning where people assimilate for themselves by assembling truth from many sources and creating a thoughtful outcome specific to their need.
  5. The only people that don’t see the misdirection the church applies to certain topics/sins is the church themselves.  For an institution to focus so much effort railing against specific issues while neglecting so many other important ones diminishes its street cred and will forever make the church unattractive to outsiders irrespective of how hip, modern, or unconventional they may try to portray themselves.

Love alone is enough, at least it was for Jesus.

Breathe…

 

As the challenges mount,

breathe.

As the battles grow,

breathe.

As opposition increases,

breathe.

As frustration seems insurmountable,

breathe.

When backed in a corner,

breathe.

You can do this…

just breathe.

Understanding…

Recently I asked God a question, “how can so many believe so differently about you, each so confident they alone posses the one true path?”  It was a simple concern that a mighty God should be able to answer without much effort I thought initially.  Imagine my surprise when a still small voice echoed in the quiet.  “Beats me”

Then everything made sense.

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